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So to expand on my last post I think I just may share some thought provoking ‘stuff’ I have come across and how it entered my train of thought in eating disorder recovery. The more I read about obesity and starvation, the more I see a resemblance in the two disorders. If a person literally suffers a genetic mutation in the way their brain processes information, there is going to be a host of chemical misfirings and imbalances.

It is ALL in the head. But, being born as a person with a misfiring brain and obvious chemical deficiencies it blows my mind to read about what is really going on up there, why I really don’t see Mal in the mirror that is the Mal portrayed in pictures. There is a major genetic and biochemical component to both eating disorders and obesity (which I can probably lump into the ED category). While posing as opposite extremes of each other both have a great deal of difficulty either maintaining, gaining or losing weight. Research can only study and uncover so much information and even then, Campbell has shown us how skewed results can be when looking at studies.

Everyone has a bias and everyone thinks they’re right. If they weren’t then what would happen? No one would have opinions! But regardless the roles of leptin insulin and a range of hormones like ghrelin and the HPA axis of the brain are exceptionally important in weight regulation and hunger cueing.

Some research shows that obese people who are born with malfunctioning brains have uncontrollable appetites because of there misfiring. evolution in itself, the way we evolved and continue evolving (more horizontal evolving, lol), make it down right and damn near impossible to lose weight unconsciously once it has been gained. evolution would contribute to fat cells accumulating, and as it has happened over millions of years, they would ‘un-accumulate’ resulting in the feast vs. famine our ancestors faced.

For your average Joe who isn’t genetically mutated, hormones and neurology will effectively in most cases allow or feasting and famine, i.e. gaining and losing weight. But your body isn’t dumb, it catches on. The yoyo dieting only works so long, then you’re left with a fat confused body that is holding onto everything waiting for the next nutrient deficiency.

But either way you roll the dice, YOU as an individual WITH a functioning and working brain and body (because your reading this, I know you aint dead) have the MOST significant influence on your own mind and own body. You control your eating, your activity level and to an extent your dietary habits should always keep you in a genetically predisposed weight range. So instead of freaking out about every macronutrient, every food entity, every calories, gram, amino acid… but accept it. There’s things you can control BUT SHOULD NOT EVER make it a point to consciously do so.

This is where everyone, and I mean EVERYONE in life is going wrong. I will go out on a limb here and say THIS IS THE ULTIMATE DISEASE CAUSING, stress perplexing, and obesity rooted problem in America. People THINK that they have control over aspects of life that are, again evolutionarily speaking, NEVER supposed to be assumed, determined or even thought about. a job? Really, that’s relatively new to the human. an adaptation, we wake up to an alarm and sit at a desk for 8-10 hours a day. a hot shower? Again, really this is new to me about how 200 years ago we took a hot shower(and used soap or shampoo). Deliberately setting aside 1-2 hours a day to CONSCIOUSLY ‘workout?’. WRITING OUT, tallying, counting whatever you do food related so it can enter your body. Ohhh this is a biggie. What the fuck are you doing?

All these conscious efforts are the reason health is in such an upheaveled mess that it is today. Trying to have all this control is always going to be followed by failure, because you’re NOT EVER meant to be controlling the things  you do.

It sets up the mind of excess, those who do ‘this’ so they can feel okay with ‘that.’ when really, to begin with you should have even thought of ‘this’ and should have been actively living ‘that’ life. and in comes depression. The emotional attachment to the wrong-thoughted-world we live in heighten your risk of well, everything. From excessive food intake(because you read and mentally note a number of calories should be eaten everyday, for example). You have now set yourself up for disaster. Where exactly along the timeline of human life did someone think about a heat measurement for something that is supposed to go in your mouth and byproduct supply energy. THAT IS ALL FOOD IS, basic instincts drive us to eat it.

See, when you think about your food, you think about your intake, you think about your activity, you think about your so-called ‘healthy’ diet you’re interacting a STREAM of bodily reactions. Your body-brain system, namely your HPA axis is deregulated from energy expenditure and storage, which is mostly controls(not what you eat or think is healthy). It affects your appetite system, because this system in your body is NOT supposed to be based on when you think you should eat nor based around ‘meal times’. who the fuck eats 6 times a day? That’s ridiculous. YOUR OVERTHINKING THIS. Again, your appetite is mainly controlled by hormonal reactions based in your brain. Last you have the environment, the biological system you were born into which has impacted your eating patterns, what you ‘unconsciously think’ or SHOULDN’T BE thinking, and what is expected out of you.

I don’t know where exactly willpower centers in the body…like where it comes from? I have no idea, but it starts in the brain, I guarantee. But willpower is all you, thinking what you feel you ‘should be’ thinking. All the resulting changes in systems in your body change your social interactions, the context of how you view what is important in life, the meaning of what you see read or think, sooo sooo much. You are morphed into this brain that signals one message: you think and change when it matters to YOU and matters to your inborn environment, senses, and what it takes to ‘get along’ in life. See how selfish this is? See why eating disorders are selfish?

Willpower allows for it to keep happening, because you always have your guard up because you are ALWAYS thinking about aspects of life that should not even be considerable. And it does not stop there. Think about it. When you backtrack your eating disorder, you were not just overnight encompassed with this God-like ability to starvation upon yourself. It took willpower, and that willpower grew as your body shrunk. With each new nutritional deficiency, will power became stronger and stronger and your mind obsessively turned thought after thought which had NOTHING to do with the grand scheme of life. I did read that cognitive control, when repeated over time causes the cortex of the brain to use blood sugar more efficiently.

strange but to put it together, maybe while people are walking around stressing about X Y and Z which shouldn’t be in their brains to begin with, the repeated exposure to oddball mental states forces the chemical delivery in your brain to change resulting in obsession leading to depression and not just eating disorders, but MANY disorders. The lost ability of the chemical pathways in your brain to work correctly and how they should are not switched and focusing on large lump sums of ‘nothingness’ but to you, it’s all like incredibly crucial material.

This would improve you brain’s willpower and thus cause more blood sugar to be used, making weight loss easier. I don’t know; just think as I type here lol. Either way, for a disordered eater, CONSISTENCY in your own self-control is what’s killing you. Worrying about, as I showed selfishly earlier, shit that does not matter is making you and everyone else very very sick.

I think diets are retarded, as is the ‘desire’ to lose weight or gain weight, or exercise, or wake up to a clock every morning, or have to shuttle 80% of your income to student loans every month. It’s all flippin stupid! WORRY ABOUT THE HERE AND NOW and what life is really about. It’s random, UNPLANNED, beautiful, unpredictable, SOCIAL, loving, cherishing, a big ol learning experience. sorry, but health, body composition and weight should all be BY PRODUCTS OF THIS, and definitely NOT something you need to think about.


Hitler once said “People will swallow lies….provided they are big enough.”


I am going to harp on the vegetarians again, and in this same category, I will lump those who only get their sources of meat from stupid shit like chicken breasts and protein powder. Read up, low fat diet are killing your heart. Why? Maybe because your CONSCIOUSLY trying to keep your intake of fat low.


Stan, of the Heretic blog shows this: : “If anything, the literature shows a slight advantage of the high fat diet,” he said. “The focus on fat in dietary guidelines has been a massive distraction. … We should remove total fat from nutrition facts panels on the back of packs.”


Here, vegetarians are going to get heart disease(like how I jumped to that conclusion…keep hatin I love it. Denise of the RawFoodSOS blog recently did a post of heart disease and vegetarians. I recommend you read it, but I highlighted more than enough here :


What I want to talk about right now is one of the most oft-cited perks of being a vegetarian: an apparently lower risk of heart disease compared to omnivores. A recent paper called Chemistry Behind Vegetarianism sums it up by saying “Omnivores have a significantly higher cluster of cardiovascular risk factors compared with vegetarians, including increased body mass index, waist to hip ratio, blood pressure, plasma total cholesterol (TC), triacylglycerol and LDL-C levels, serum lipoprotein(a) concentration, plasma factor VII activity, ratios of TC/HDL-C, LDL-C/HDL-C and TAG/HDL-C, and serum ferritin levels.” As we know, gender and smoking influenced the serum hs-CRP level significantly. In our previous study, there are more males and smokers in the omnivore group that can influence the statistical power of difference of hs-CRP between both groups. Actually, it failed to demonstrate a significant difference if male and female samples were analyzed separately. The surprising results? The vegetarians had significantly thicker arterial walls (p<0.0001), reduced flow-mediated dilation (a predictor of cardiovascular events) (p<0.0001), higher blood pressure (p<0.05), and higher triglycerides (p<0.05) than the omnivores. (According to the paper, the raised blood pressure might be related to some popular high-sodium vegetarian foods such as processed protein food substitutes, fake oyster sauce, and tomato paste.) In the researchers’ multivariate statistical models, vegetarianism had the strongest association with both artery thickness and diminished flow-mediated dilation out of all the variables documented—including age, gender, and triglyceride levels. As might be expected, the vegetarians also had lower B12 levels and higher homocysteine than the control group—but even after adjusting for these, vegetarianism remained strongly linked with less-healthy hearts. The researchers concluded with this: In summary, contrary to common belief, vegetarians, at least in the Chinese, might have accelerated atherosclerosis and abnormal arterial endothelial function, compared with omnivore control subjects. The increased risk could only be partially explained by their higher blood pressure, triglyceride, homocysteine, and lower vitamin B12 concentrations.

But just for kicks, let’s see what those sensationalist medical journals are trying to scare us with:

Vitamin B12 deficiency is associated with coronary artery disease in an Indian population. “Also, vegetarians were found to have significantly lower vitamin B12 concentrations (p=0.0001) and higher incidence of [coronary artery disease] (p=0.01).”

Vitamin B-12 and homocysteine status among vegetarians: a global perspective. “Overall, the studies we reviewed showed reduced mean vitamin B-12 status and elevated mean homocysteine concentrations in vegetarians, particularly among vegans. … Hyperhomocysteinemia is associated with an increased risk of atherosclerosis and cardiovascular disease.”

Vitamin B12 and homocysteine status in asymptomatic Indian toddlers. “We studied the prevalence of V B(12) deficiency and hyperhomocysteinemia in 51 asymptomatic toddlers, from Pune, India. V B(12) levels were low and total serum homocysteine was high in 14% and homocysteine levels were significantly higher in boys. Programming for cardiovascular risk in adulthood possibly starts at a very young age through the homocysteine axis.”

German vegan study: diet, life-style factors, and cardiovascular risk profile. “Although TC and LDL concentrations were favorable, low HDL and elevated homocysteine and Lp(a) concentrations were unfavorable. Overall, these results confirm the notion that a vegan diet is deficient in vitamin B(12), which may have an unfavorable effect on CHD risk.”


Also, thanks to one of my commenters I have checked out Dr Rosedale and what he has to offer my ever education oriented mind: “[People] get fat by not being able to burn it. And, that is 100% controlled by hormones (leptin and insulin)…”


Don of Primal Wisdom will point out why red meat does ANYTHING BUT cause women strokes here: where he states: This study didn’t show that eating a diet rich in red meat causes strokes.  On the contrary, it showed that at least 95% of people who eat the so-called high meat diet don’t suffer strokes.  It also showed that if you massage the data correctly, you get a result that will get media attention and support conventional preconceptions.


Still not satisfied, here:

A study by Cho, et. al. showed that women in the Nurses Study who had the highest fat intake had the lowest cancer rates. This was purported to show that an Atkins-type diet was unhealthy, but the data differed significantly from the conclusions.


Women who ate the most fat, the 5th quintile, had lower cancer rates than those who ate less fat (3rd and 4th quintiles.)

Those with very low animal fat intake had the lowest cancer rates.

The cancer rates in all quintiles was less than 1%, with rates between 0.68%-0.88% so differences are not really significant

Similar studies do not differentiate saturated fat intake from vegetable sources which is more dangerous than from animal saturated fats which may have very different effects.


And here, if you think good protein will damage your kidney or magically induce cancer when it is from freaking REAL FOOD: One thing is certain: low-protein diets depressed normal growth, increased the susceptibility to many toxins, killed toxin-exposed animals earlier, induced fatty liver, and increased the development of pre-cancerous lesions when fed during the initiation period of chemical carcinogenesis.


What do I think of all this, dietarily speaking?


  • There is NO advantage to eating less meat, especially fatty meat
  • There is no advantage to replacing meat with vegetables
  • Grain based diets, or those including are the biggest cause of hyperinsulimea. More the reason for a person in recovery to avoid because, there’s no evolution backing its consumption, and anorexics suffer hyperinsulemia while gaining weight
  • Grains and beans and even vegetables contain antinutrients, meaning your body nets more NEGATIVE nutrient leeching from eating them.
  • Up to 65% of what you think you’re getting from your high fruit and vegetable diet IS NOT EVEN BEING ABSORBED BY YOUR BODY


And lastly, being the practicing Roman Catholic girl I am as well as having many religious conscious readers in recovery, I will leave you with some interesting tid bits:

In Genesis 9:3: “Every moving thing that lives shall be food for you. I have given you all things, even as the green herbs.”

In Genesis 18:8 the Lord comes down and visits with Abraham. During that visit it is recorded that God Himself- ate butter, meat, and raw milk. (So we know that since it’s in there, He wanted us to see that He gave His stamp of approval to these food sources.)

God commanded His priest to eat meat on at least 7 different occasions in the Old Testament. It is recorded that Jesus himself, ate fish and lamb, and on many occasions fed others meat, encouraged the catching of fish for food, and even cooked it.

Does it even make sense to claim that God wants us to only eat vegetables when He himself ate and encouraged the eating of meat?